The Company of Friends

Judy and I at Moosewood.

 “Talk between women friends is always therapy…”
Jayne Anne Phillips

After a rather glum couple of days, missing my kids as only a mother can, I looked forward to a quiet evening alone. It was Halloween and at least one of my kids was trick or treating. They had rides already and didn’t need me. Alan had a date with one of his boys to watch the made-for-tv version of IT and I had a date with Scrivener, the program I just downloaded free for the duration of NaNoWriMo 2017. I needed to get comfortable with it before diving into writing.

As butternut squash, portobello mushrooms and onions roasted in the oven for dinner, I sat at my desk, trying not to hunch over my laptop. I was considering an Instagram post, starting to compose it in my head and enter the photos into Layout, when my phone rang.

It was a close friend, calling to ask if I’d like to rummage through her collection of fabric and take whatever I liked for my craft business. We talked shop–various fabrics and where to find them, craft fairs she knew of that I didn’t, and books, of course. Always books.

“There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.”
P.G. Wodehouse

We moved on to deeper subjects like close relationships, work, and health issues. And we talked of her coming over for dinner in the next week or so. Just the sound of her voice and the interaction over the phone brought such warmth and encouragement to my whole self.

Ellie and I at The Watershed in Ithaca.

Although I didn’t realize it until she called, I needed a friend, a person who knew the real me, even if we were talking of weighty things. I didn’t mind that, but I was craving the connection, those minutes listening, learning, sharing and laughing as only two people who know each other can do.

Sandy and I at Hector Wine Company.

After we finished our conversation, my whole outlook brightened; the night no longer seemed lonely. I felt nourished inside instead of starving. I felt hope, possibility, and the joy of an afternoon or evening together to anticipate.

If you’re wondering if a friend or family member needs a phone call, text, or a letter in the mail, don’t hesitate, act on your hunch. If you’re feeling in need of a friend, reach out. We are healthier and happier with meaningful connections. We live longer. Let’s be grateful for the friends we have and nurture our treasured relationships.

“A good friend is a connection to life – a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world.”
Lois Wyse

Laurie and I at the Rongovian Embassy right before they closed.


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